Chapter 1 – Connecting Increases your Influence in Every Situation
Connecting can Make or Break You
It’s not enough just to work hard. It’s not enough to do a great job. To be successful, you need to learn how to really communicate with others.
Connecting is Key
Connecting is the ability to identify with people & relate to them in a way that increases your influence with them
The number one criteria for advancement and promotion for professionals is an ability to communicate effectively – Harvard Business Review
Connecting is Crucial for Leaders
Nothing in life is more important than the ability to communicate effectively. Talent isn’t enough. Experience isn’t enough. To lead others, you must be able to communicate well, and connecting is the key.
Successful Presidents exhibit five qualities that enable them to achieve things that others don’t – Vision; Pragmatism; Consensus Building; Charisma; Trustworthiness
Connecting Helps in Every Area of Life
Connecting is vital for any person who wants to achieve success. It is essential for anyone who wants to build great relationships. You will only be able to reach your potential when you learn to connect with people.
Desire to Change
When you connect with others, you position yourself to make the most of your skills and talents
Courage to Change
- Things I can change but don’t know how to change
- Your Coping skills are greater than your Connecting skills – coping isn’t moving forward. It’s static & inherently defensive in nature. It’s reactive. Merely coping doesn’t help anyone accomplish anything. It merely keeps a person afloat.
- You want to make a Difference, Not just know about the difference
- You need more than courage to change things – you need connecting skills
- Connecting starts with your Attitude – The ability to connect with others begins with understanding the value of people.
- To be Effective in any are of life – Connect
Principles behind connecting with others
- Focusing on others
- Expanding your connecting vocabulary beyond just words
- Marshalling your energy for connecting
- Gaining insight in how great connectors connect
- Practical Skills of Connecting
- Finding Common Ground
- Making your Communication Simple
- Capturing People’s interest
- Inspiring them
- Being Authentic
Connecting One on One
- Talk more about the other person and less about yourself. Prepare two or three questions you can ask someone before a meeting or social gathering
- Bring something of Value, a book, CD.
- At close of conversation ask if there is anything you can do to help them and then follow up on that.
Connecting in a group
- Look for ways to compliment people in the group for their ideas & actions
- Look for ways to add value to people
- Don’t take credit when the group succeeds, and don’t caste blame when it fails
- Find ways to help the group celebrate successes together
Connecting with an Audience
- Let your listeners know that you are excited with them
- Communicate that you desir4e to add value to them
- Let them know how they or their organization add value to you.